The Noticer

We've been studying Mark Twain in Humanities class. One thing my professor pointed out was that Mark Twain was a 'noticer' and she encouraged us to be noticers as well. Now, people fascinate me. I always want to figure out how they work and why they do what they do. Becoming a 'noticer' was not hard for me to do because I already pay a lot of attention to things. Here's a tip for all you writers: Pay attention to your surroundings. Pay attention to the way things sound, feel, taste, and look like so that you can describe it more accurately in your prose. If you've ever read Mark Twain, then you are aware of how descriptive he was. In 'Huckleberry Finn', he captured the essence of Americanism in that day, both in the language of the people and how they lived. He had talent for portraying things the way they really were. Part of being a good writer is making it seem real. Instead of writing, 'The air smelled like grease' you could write, 'The air was heavy and sticky with grease making it hard to breathe easily.' Which sentence paints a more mental image for you?

I love details. I love having things explained, even if it means taking something apart and dissecting it myself. The question and answer format used in most writing styles is also found in song writing.

In my own songwriting, I try to capture a real problem and give a definitive answer. It could be about religion, faith, politics, education, war, or peace. It can be hard to get exactly what I want when I am rhyming lines and trying to make smooth stanzas, bridges, and choruses. However, If I know exactly what I want to say in one particular song, I simply pinpoint that idea and separate related ideas or views. I just wrote a song about how easy it is to lose sight of what's important, and what I was referring to was God. No worries, I'm not going to preach at you. My whole point here is that you have to figure out what it is you want to pinpoint. In order to be a good noticer, you must first notice yourself.

What do I know, I'm just a poor college student. Although, I know that macroeconomics is the study of aggregate economic behavior focusing on employment, inflation, and economic growth. I also know that if you are still reading this, I must not have bored you too much, and that's always a stellar thing.

So, go notice and be noticed...in a good way.

May the frets be with you.

My Valentine

Removed by User.

Thank You Jesus

Yes, I got my second chance...

May the frets be with you.

Two Realities

Its hard, sometimes, to separate what we choose to believe from the true reality. Its easier to believe lies and live in your own reality. Of course, then you world slowly falls apart because it's been built on lies and it has no real foundation to rely on. But what is harsher - having your reality ripped away, or continuing to live in it without ever realizing what you're missing?

I'm glad I live in a real reality. Yes, my own reality is much nicer and softer and exactly what I need. Or is it? It is what I choose to believe is good for me. There are so many harsh things in true reality that I come to face with. Though I wouldn't see them in my own dream, I would never have the experience to grow, to overcome, to thrive, to become. I would become a vegetable, never having to exercise my brain or body --and that I could not bear.

However, I've come to find that in CERTAIN aspects of reality, it is safer to retreat back into my own. In times of duress and pain, surrounded by the constant needs and wants of others, I can receed slightly into my own reality and downplay the pains, murmurs, heartbreaks, and gasps for breath that I myself endure. I can make them become almost unreal. The sad part is when they become too real for my fake world and they enter the real one and I realize I shouldn't be downplaying them. However I never learn, and I stuff them back. I have no time nor do I have any desire to focus on myself. It is the last thing I want to do.

So where do I go now? I go to sleep. That's the beautiful thing about tomorrow. It's as if today never happened. It is only a faint recollection of the mind, and the mind is a faulty, undependable mediator between yesterday and today. So I sleep...and I dream...and I awake and decide that today is not the day to think of myself, it is the day to think of others. I, myself, am not that important, nor am I that fragile and weak that I need the attention. I may want it, desperately want it, but my selflessness will always win.

So where do I go now? I go to sleep so I can wake up and pretend that today never happened.



May the frets be with you.

Please Give Me A Second Chance

What do you do when you make the biggest mistake of your life and you know everything you've worked for can disappear...just...like...that?

I did something very, very stupid. I knew it was stupid when I was doing it but I was so caught up in the moment that I didn't care. Now I have to deal with the pain and uncertainty and guilty conscious as I wait to find out whether my actions will have the expected reprecussion or if I'll walk away with a very valuable lesson and a second chance.

I am praying, praying, praying for a second chance.

I know what I did was wrong and I am dying inside because of what could happen. I could lose everything--my family, my friends, my future. The shame of my poor choices would be incapable for me to bear, because I have so many looking up to me. I am afraid I would run away, or possibly commit suicide. And I would never be able to look at my changed future with the same kind of love and acceptance, and that would be unfair to my future. So I pray, Dear LORD, please, please, please spare the child... I will NEVER make the same mistake again, I swear. Please, I beg in the name of Jesus, please let me walk away with a valuable lesson and a second chance. Jesus Christ, please hear me, hear Your child and deliver me from my fevered brain and broken body.

I don't know what I'll do if I am denied a second chance. I suppose I will just pic up the pieces and try to start over...maybe somewhere else, amongst other people...

May the frets be with you.

Love

Love is always patient and kind.

It is never jealous.

Love is never boastful or conceited.

Love is pure and is never rude or selfish.

It does not take offense and is not resentful.

Love takes no pleasure in other people's pain, but tries to offer relief.

Love always sees the best and refuses to give up.

It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes.

♥ This is love ♥

The Right Direction

Its dangerous to stop in mid stride. Your smooth trail is broken as you stumble and come to a sharp halt. You find yourself noticing all the flaws that are in your path. You begin to question why you chose this path at all. You stand there as other people walk around you, throwing dirty looks over their shoulders because you have interrupted their day. You stare at the sky. Then you stare at the road. You gaze at the people and wonder why that woman thought that dress was attractive or why that man chose his hairstyle. You notice a wafting distraction and you lift your nose into the air and sniff. You smell coffee and grease and gas. Your revelations are interrupted by the obnoxious honking of an irate driver. 'Hurry up!' he yells, and you watch as he gestures in frustration. Over your shoulder, you hear a babbling teenager. 'I told him to get a life. I don't need a jerk for a boyfriend.' She passes you and you watch and listen as her friends cheer on her decision. 'I said I wanted that deal done today!' You whip your head to the right and spy a woman in a sleek black business suit walking gracefully in her high heels while sniping into her cellphone. Her lips are drawn tight and there is murder in her eyes. You shudder as she passes you and you look up and say a silent prayer thanking God you are not the unfortunate on the other end of the line. To the left you hear a loud buzzing. Across the street, you can see a construction crew working in the hot sun. The workers bare arms are shiny from sweat and their clothes are smeared with tar and grime. The shrill, grating sound of a bull horn causes you to wince. The sulfur reeks and you wrinkle you're nose as a sudden gust of wind blows it your way. You take in the world that is in front of you and all around you. You take in all it's flaws and all it's perfections. Your eyes are drawn back to yourself, back to your own path. You focus your senses on yourself and realize that you have been standing there for quite sometime. You look behind you and see your smooth gait from before. You walked easy and light, evenly and without hesitation. Now you've stopped. You look ahead of you once again. You remember why you chose this path. What was the reason, what is the reason you walk this way? Only you know. You know it and it burns inside you, reigniting your fire and zest for life. You put your hands in your pocket, look down at the pavement, and smirk at yourself. You look up, raise your right foot and place it down in front of your left foot. Once again, you begin walking, easy, light, and without hesitation....

It's dangerous to stop mid stride. Yes, it's very dangerous because when you trip and then stop, you begin to doubt. You doubt your intentions, your motivations, and your choices.

However, sometimes coming to a sharp halt is the best thing. If you are able to look around and observe all that you are not...and still continue on your way, laughing at the doubts that briefly clouded your mind; if you are able to pick up straight where you left off and continue on the same way; if you are able to remember why you started in the first place and if that motivation is still your driving force--then you know you are headed in the right direction.

May the frets be with you.