Please Give Me A Second Chance

What do you do when you make the biggest mistake of your life and you know everything you've worked for can disappear...just...like...that?

I did something very, very stupid. I knew it was stupid when I was doing it but I was so caught up in the moment that I didn't care. Now I have to deal with the pain and uncertainty and guilty conscious as I wait to find out whether my actions will have the expected reprecussion or if I'll walk away with a very valuable lesson and a second chance.

I am praying, praying, praying for a second chance.

I know what I did was wrong and I am dying inside because of what could happen. I could lose everything--my family, my friends, my future. The shame of my poor choices would be incapable for me to bear, because I have so many looking up to me. I am afraid I would run away, or possibly commit suicide. And I would never be able to look at my changed future with the same kind of love and acceptance, and that would be unfair to my future. So I pray, Dear LORD, please, please, please spare the child... I will NEVER make the same mistake again, I swear. Please, I beg in the name of Jesus, please let me walk away with a valuable lesson and a second chance. Jesus Christ, please hear me, hear Your child and deliver me from my fevered brain and broken body.

I don't know what I'll do if I am denied a second chance. I suppose I will just pic up the pieces and try to start over...maybe somewhere else, amongst other people...

May the frets be with you.

Love

Love is always patient and kind.

It is never jealous.

Love is never boastful or conceited.

Love is pure and is never rude or selfish.

It does not take offense and is not resentful.

Love takes no pleasure in other people's pain, but tries to offer relief.

Love always sees the best and refuses to give up.

It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes.

♥ This is love ♥

The Right Direction

Its dangerous to stop in mid stride. Your smooth trail is broken as you stumble and come to a sharp halt. You find yourself noticing all the flaws that are in your path. You begin to question why you chose this path at all. You stand there as other people walk around you, throwing dirty looks over their shoulders because you have interrupted their day. You stare at the sky. Then you stare at the road. You gaze at the people and wonder why that woman thought that dress was attractive or why that man chose his hairstyle. You notice a wafting distraction and you lift your nose into the air and sniff. You smell coffee and grease and gas. Your revelations are interrupted by the obnoxious honking of an irate driver. 'Hurry up!' he yells, and you watch as he gestures in frustration. Over your shoulder, you hear a babbling teenager. 'I told him to get a life. I don't need a jerk for a boyfriend.' She passes you and you watch and listen as her friends cheer on her decision. 'I said I wanted that deal done today!' You whip your head to the right and spy a woman in a sleek black business suit walking gracefully in her high heels while sniping into her cellphone. Her lips are drawn tight and there is murder in her eyes. You shudder as she passes you and you look up and say a silent prayer thanking God you are not the unfortunate on the other end of the line. To the left you hear a loud buzzing. Across the street, you can see a construction crew working in the hot sun. The workers bare arms are shiny from sweat and their clothes are smeared with tar and grime. The shrill, grating sound of a bull horn causes you to wince. The sulfur reeks and you wrinkle you're nose as a sudden gust of wind blows it your way. You take in the world that is in front of you and all around you. You take in all it's flaws and all it's perfections. Your eyes are drawn back to yourself, back to your own path. You focus your senses on yourself and realize that you have been standing there for quite sometime. You look behind you and see your smooth gait from before. You walked easy and light, evenly and without hesitation. Now you've stopped. You look ahead of you once again. You remember why you chose this path. What was the reason, what is the reason you walk this way? Only you know. You know it and it burns inside you, reigniting your fire and zest for life. You put your hands in your pocket, look down at the pavement, and smirk at yourself. You look up, raise your right foot and place it down in front of your left foot. Once again, you begin walking, easy, light, and without hesitation....

It's dangerous to stop mid stride. Yes, it's very dangerous because when you trip and then stop, you begin to doubt. You doubt your intentions, your motivations, and your choices.

However, sometimes coming to a sharp halt is the best thing. If you are able to look around and observe all that you are not...and still continue on your way, laughing at the doubts that briefly clouded your mind; if you are able to pick up straight where you left off and continue on the same way; if you are able to remember why you started in the first place and if that motivation is still your driving force--then you know you are headed in the right direction.

May the frets be with you.